I recently had my attention drawn back to an old episode of "Sex and the City" where the girls were all discussing how a guy can be great on paper---meaning be handsome, have a great job, buy you flowers all the time, etc.---but still fail to satisfy you. Most of you have probably experienced this.
As soon as you told your friends about him/her their jaws dropped and they told you that they could not wait to meet this great catch of yours. You smiled weakly and half-heartedly showed off your "great catch" at the next hastily arranged gathering.
So why is good-on-paper
not neccessarily so good
when set into action?
I have a humble theory based upon my very recent experience with a good-on-paper-guy. He is a gorgeous looking man with everything from a dazzling smile to athleticism; he can even dance! To add to the list, he has a great job and is still working doing "fun" lucrative projects on the side. I found a guy who is not only good-looking and successful, but ambitious! And he thinks I am something else, too . . .
Now, what could possibly be wrong with a man who thinks you are the hottest chick since Cleopatra and the most desirable thing since ice-cream? 
Unfortunately, a lot can be wrong with Mr. Good-on-Paper.In my case, my good-on-paper-guy and I face a language barrier that fuddles communication. He speaks Spanish and my native tongue is English. We tried out Spang-lish (a blend of Spanish and English) for awhile, but it becomes extremely hard to communicate. Recently we had a near argument over him responding "sure" to a question I asked all because we were misunderstanding each other. To add to this, even though he is several years my senior, his weekend life is of a much more adolescent nature than I engage in at this point in my life. Essentially, our leisure-time activities did not match up. Not only that, but his great devotion to work ultimately leaves me waiting on him to make time for me even though he is more than willing to make the effort.
This is not to dissuade you from trying things out with someone who seems like they can offer you the things you deserve like offers stability, an endless supply of charm and consistent affection. I merely want for you to remember that there is no such thing as perfect and
every relationship is going to take work and compromise. I have not given up on my good-on-paper-guy, but he got me thinking about what "good-on-paper" really means to me as an individual.
It is possible to be perfectly happy with a free-spirit who lacks traditional good looks and whose table manners are reminiscent of an untrained monkey.
Everything in a relationship is dependant on what each individual dater likes and is willing to compromise to make the relationship work. So you have to decide for yourself what "good-on-paper" really means . . .
5 comments:
i love sex and the city..and i think it's cool how you relate the show to your blog because the two really work well together. its cool to read about your personal experience in relation to the idea of the show, because that's really what myself and most of the girls i know do. everytime we watch it we somehow always have some personal experience to relate to it.
I come to this blog for many reasons – the blog is entertaining, accurate, funny and attractive. I enjoy reading your writing style a lot. Also, the advice you give tends to be dead on. You take the advice and making it funny, to the point where I am giggling in my seat. You layout/format is very attractive as well. I love your pink font. It is a good pink too – I would have thought that was part of a template if I did not realize you were doing it on your own.
All of your posts are compelling, but once in them, my eyes are immediately drawn to the pink text. I love it. And said text tends to be the most important text of all – which works out perfectly.
I really have nothing to suggest. You clearly know what you are doing and what you plan to write; I look forward to reading more.
It's very entertaining to read your perspective on these things!
You use very complementary photographs but I'd suggest that you scale them down a bit or increase the width of your main text box.
I admire your bold font-changing skills (though I'm too timid to try it myself). I think it looks wonderful, and really keeps my attention moving down the page.
Your emphases and pink font make the blog easy to read - even when the text bends around an image. The images seem rather large - is that a deliberate design choice? You didn't sound too enthused when talking about the blog. Have you gone off the boil? Grade available on request.
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