Today's Chivalry

If any of you were ever a little boy, you may remember hearing at one time or another that

you have to be nice to girls.

I know my younger brother heard that phrase more than a few times just as he was swinging back a foam bat (or some other torture device) while aiming for my head. Yet I am not so sure that "being nice to girls" equates "chivalry."

Chivalry was originally associated with proper knightly conduct in medieval times. This included honorable action in battle and courtly love. Of course these days when one says "chivalry," we immediately think of men opening car doors for women and laying down their jackets over puddles.

Yet I rarely see anyone go out of their way to be courteous to anyone else (regardless of genders!) Which brings us to the dilemma of recognizing and appreciating genuine acts of kindness.

More than a few times I have heard that a man will not do something nice for you without expecting "something" in return.

And I think it is fair to say that this is true, but what is important to remember for both men and women, is that

the "something" that is desired varies from person to person and can even change through the passing of time.

There have been at least a handful of men who have waltzed through my life who I never gave the opportunity of a dance to (even when they used impeccably chivalrous manners.) My reasoning at the time was that those guys were too nice and mama didn't raise a fool! "Uh-uh!" I said to myself. "I know what this is about ..Because men only want one thing!"

Looking back on it now I can laugh at myself because I see how narrow-minded I was being. Not everyone is going to be the right kind of person for you and not everyone is going to understand romance the way YOU like it, but that does not mean that everyone you meet is trying to take advantage of you. They may in fact be having their hand at chivalry.

Remember when I told you that more than a few times I have heard that a man will not do something nice for you unless he is expecting "something" in return? Well, it may just be that all he expects in return is a chance for the two of you to get to know each other. He might be the contemporary White Knight.

So please be wise, fellow-daters. Be wary of those bearing foam bats,

but be sure to keep your eye out for the one who can make you smile...